Keep in mind that validating someone’s emotions does not mean that you resign yourself to be treated poorly.
If your loved one is behaving inappropriately or aggressively, removing yourself from the situation is your best bet.
Emotional validation is the process of learning about, understanding and expressing acceptance of another person’s emotional experience.
Emotional validation is distinguished from emotional invalidation, in which another person’s emotional experiences are rejected, ignored, or judged.
This can be hard if the other person has not clearly communicated their feelings, so you may have to either ask them what they are feeling, or guess and then ask them if you are right.
The next step is to identify the situation or cue that triggered the emotion.
Ask the person what it is that is causing their response.
They may not even understand themselves what is going on, or they may be unwilling to articulate what triggered the emotion.Frankly, if you are the friend or family member of someone with BPD, it can be very hard to have a validating response to emotions that seem out of proportion with the situation.But invalidating your loved one’s response probably doesn’t help.For example, you might just say, “I know you are feeling angry because I was 15 minutes late coming home.It was not my intention to anger you; I was stuck in traffic.One of the four options we have in any problem situation is acceptance.Validation is one way that we communicate acceptance of ourselves and others. When your best friend or a family member makes a decision that you really don't think is wise, validation is a way of supporting them and strengthening the relationship while maintaining a different opinion.So it is common to ask if a business will validate your parking receipt.Parking lots are becoming more and more automated, so I don't know how the system will work without humans involved.Rather, you communicate to them that you understand what they are feeling, without trying to talk them out of the feeling or shame them for the feeling.When you validate an emotional response, the first step is to acknowledge the emotion that the other person is having.