But better than that, write him a really nice letter..too long..let him know you are fond of his company but you are completely understanding of his arduous schedule and committment. I couldn't see that "quote un quote" "standard" rules of dating(which I had not abided by well at all before), would apply, but then I thought maybe I was fooling myself.
Let him know you would like to get to know him better but that you also understand that this has to be in his good time as his schedule permits. If you decide to date someone besides a resident physician, post again and I'll give you the facts for successful dating of someone who is not so dedicated to his work. He seems like a great person, and I am actually a very independent woman.
I want to be understanding (and I do understand) the long hours, etc.
I know that means he doesn't have much energy to plan interesting dates.
How do I find out if that's also what he's interested in?
I don't want to have sex with him until I find out, because I don't want to be hurt. I feel like I really screwed up my past relation ships by 1)being too available 2)not communicating well with previous boyfriends about my intentions. But if they are not interested in a relationship , how can I find that out from the get go?
Yet he has definitely made time to see me and do things with me. How can I find out if his intentions are just "casual dating" or really perhaps a "relationship".His schedule will be unpredictable and his level of energy will be likewise.Since he is human, he desires female companionship but, again, there is just no way he can be devoted to any relationship other than with his career at this time..just accept that.I have been really hurt over the past couple of relationships and am not interested in just "dating for the sake of dating".I am more interested in getting to know him and him getting to know me.Chances are excellent that if you are still around..you have the patience to bare with him during the final years of his training..will have the desire to marry you at some point. A doctor's wife must be independent and able to be happy doing things alone. I don't think anyone can experience the full bouquet of love unless they give of their entire self but, in doing so, you become highly vulnerable.She also has to be understanding of all the other chicks out there that will be after him because they want to jump on the gravy train of high income he will produce. Inherent in almost every great thing we experience is the possiblity of achieving its opposite.Now, if you stick by him..he is fond of you..you are understanding and there for him during this period, you stand to make out big time when his residency is completed.As a general rule, doctors don't have a lot of time to date around. Unless he's going to be a psychiatrist, dermatologist or some other wimpy type of doctor, his schedule will be intensive and he won't have a great deal of time to spend with you. You can't avoid hurt if it's going to happen, but you can get early warning signals and minimize the possibilities by staying conscious of what's going on.However, I don't feel like I can corner him in a corner with questions that may send him away forever. You picked the wrong guy to use rules for successful dating on.However, I will give you some good tips on how to date a physician.