I 100% agree with Patti Stanger's "no sex before monogamy" rule.
If you have the same values and goals in life and are attracted to each other, a relationship-oriented guy wants a relationship.
In the end he's not a recommended partner for life.
So even if you get him into the relationship, if you have to keep creating "the chase," then when the heck are you going to be able to relax and feel secure?
Since he is probably still figuring himself out, you have the opportunity to mold him into what you want him to be.
Guys tend to mature more slowly than women and at an older age.