Please only submit title-help questions about period dramas!If you submit a question or answer that we feel is inappropriate, we reserve the right to delete it!Similarly, you and your spouse may include a mutual waiver of alimony in your divorce agreement.If you waive your right to alimony, you can’t get it back, even if your marriage lasted over ten years.Ten years is also important if your spouse is in the military and will be eligible for retirement pay.If you were married for at least ten years while he was on active duty, you will qualify for direct enforcement, which means your portion of retirement pay will be paid directly to you by the military finance office.
My nine-year marriage has been rocky for quite some time, and my husband and I periodically talk about divorce.A ten-year marriage is also considered to be a long-term marriage by the Social Security Administration.If you were married for ten years of longer, you will be eligible to collect derivative Social Security benefits based on your ex-spouse’s earnings record when you reach retirement age (if you aren’t married to someone else at the time). For help in protecting yourself from violence in general – including sociopathic violence, I strongly recommend Gavin de Becker’s book, The Gift of Fear. Although sociopaths are great actors, and can feign hurt feelings, know that they have no feelings to hurt – they are manipulating you. Related to this: challenge your need to be polite in all situations. Second (and third and fourth) chances are for those who have a conscience. Although another favorite sociopathic trick is to defer blame and make other’s take responsibility for their behavior, “You owe me,” is another favorite phrase of the sociopath, know that you are not at fault. “’Please don’t tell,’ is the trademark plea of thieves, child abusers – and sociopaths,” writes Stout. Others deserve to be warned more than the sociopath deserves to be protected. Don’t let someone without a conscience try to convince you that people aren’t good. Disturbing, isn’t it, to think about one in 25 of us having no conscience. Disturbing to think about the ease with which a sociopath creates a swath of destruction…and that they get away with it…all you can do, usually, is steer clear. For a thorough discussion on this, read Stout’s book. That’s 4% of the population, or about 12 million Americans. Maybe it was a romantic partner you think back on and describe as evil. All sociopaths violent – some emotionally, and some physically as well. Don’t compete with, or try to outsmart, or psychoanalyze, or even banter with a sociopath. Minimize or eliminate the sociopath from your life. If you find yourself pitying someone who consistently hurts you or other people, chances are close to 100% that you are dealing with a sociopath. Never agree, for any reason, to help conceal the true character of a sociopath. But did you know that we cross paths with sociopaths on a regular basis — and often don’t even know it? In particular, I like his Pre-Incident Indicators (PINs), which reads like a menu of sociopathic characteristics: So now you have a lead on how to recognize a sociopath, and hopefully red flags will rise when you encounter one. It makes sense if you think about it – without human connection, what else is there? Names you probably think of — real and fiction — when you hear the word “sociopath”. In fact, many researchers believe that 1 in 25 Americans fit the criteria for sociopathy. This book discusses the predictability of violence – great for avoiding sociopaths. Especially around those who claim that by dominating others they are helping a greater good. Know the difference between compliments and flattery. Sociopaths take full advantage of our social reflexes. Know that most of us do, thankfully, posses a conscience, and can love. But here’s another item I’d add to the list, something I’ve been known to say in my sessions with clients: 14) (That’s not a typo. In a nutshell, because of the unrelenting boredom they feel, sociopaths create drama, take massive risks – even, sometimes, kill. Many sociopaths live their lives relatively undetected – except, perhaps, by those closest to them… And one of the most difficult things about dealing with a sociopath is when you see it…others around you don’t.Visitors to this site often contact us when they can't remember the title of a period drama that they have seen.Below are the descriptions and suggestions sent in by visitors to the site.