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Good messages for online dating sites

If you’re sending a message, the recipient already knows you’ve looked at their pictures and find them attractive.

So instead of stating the obvious (“you look like a small child and I enjoy sexing small children”), point to what it was that attracted you to their personality (or at least the fragment of their personality that they put on the internet).

Funny is good, but if you are not actually funny, don’t strain anything trying to be.

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We know you’re trying to be “random” or “funny” with your ridiculous message about getting married / having babies / getting divorced / giraffes / or whatever other inappropriate thing you are messaging to dozens of people at once. It also doesn’t trick anyone (other than the slowest people on the internet) into thinking you wrote that totally nonsensical message just for us.

No one wants to date sad-sack, and no one wants to hear about your terrible past dating life the first time they talk to you.

We’re all internet dating here – it follows that we are all single and perhaps don’t want to be.

There are lots of reasons why someone may sign into OK Cupid, check their messages, and not message you back. Or, they might be checking their inbox quickly, and will respond later. But the quickest way to get yourself classified as a psycho is to message someone more than once without getting a reply. Repeat messaging says, “I am a creep with boundary issues.” And sure, there’s someone out there for everyone, but you will widen your dating pool by not being a creep with boundary issues.

Yes, we’re all animals here and yes, dating is initially about physical attraction, but there has to be something more to make a relationship (or even a not-totally-painful date) work out.

292 comments

  1. Steps To The Perfect Online Dating Message. into thinking you wrote that totally nonsensical message just for us. Funny is good, but if you are not actually funny, don’t strain anything trying to be. Straightforward and nice is infinitely better than trying to be funny and failing miserably. Advertisement 4. Maintain a 11 message ratio. Share On

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