Am Not, You Are Of course, today's post is all in the name of fun so before anyone gets precious, defensive or hurt... If we can't poke some fun from time to time, then we're all taking life and ourselves too seriously. Self Help Books - Craig Harper Ezine Articles - [email protected] The Free Library - craigharper - MU Gather - craigharper Go - [email protected] Self Growth - [email protected] Article Dashboard - [email protected] Article Alley - [email protected] Article Base - [email protected] Amazines - [email protected] Searchwarp - knol yahoo contrib Craig Harper is one of Australia's leading self help authors. In light of these revelations, I thought that perhaps the time had come for someone amazing, insightful, qualified and courageous to address the issue of emotional intelligence in blokes. Sure, they're happy to tell their 'better half' how the world works but would they ever ask her for some advice or an opinion? Tool Time As I said, lately I have spoken with several women in their late-twenties to mid-fifties who, for a range of interesting reasons, are back on the dating scene and the overwhelming feedback I get from them is that the majority of available men are... If she does work out then you shouldn't have to ask (it should be apparent) and if she doesn't, then she'll assume you're suggesting she should. Craig Harper is one of Australia's leading self help authors.A study by Wilbur & Campbell (2011) examined how humor works in romantic situations.They first examined how men and women use humor to get to know potential dates.
Yes, I told her that I have a girlfriend and I also told her that I only contacted her because I was reviewing this dating site. Yes, Bali is one of the hot spots for female sex tourism.Women are more evaluative of men’s humor because they are more careful in their mate selection and looking for ideal traits in their mate.Men could also be using humor as a way to reveal they are a worthy mate choice.They also found the same results in evaluating dating profiles.Men were more likely to describe themselves as funny, whereas women were more frequently found to say they were looking for someone with a great sense of humor. Recently, I've been chatting with some women (friends and clients) who have shared some pretty alarming things with me about their experiences dating the males of the species. Unless, of course, sport comes under the banner of deep-and-meaningful. Notice - one analogy for the girls and one for the boys. If you're a fifty year-old bloke, don't dress like a rapper and don't use the words bro, dude, totally or awesome. Don't ever ask a woman how much she weighs (my friend experienced this last week) and don't ask her if she works out. Feel free to contribute to the conversation without taking it, you or me too seriously. So, it seems that some men are a little (or, a lot) inept when it comes to all things emotional. My research tells me that, while many men will happily run into a burning building, sacrifice a limb or take a bullet to save their girlfriend or wife, most would rather staple their scrotum to a bench than switch off the TV and engage in any kind of deep-and-meaningful conversation. No, for some reason, Craig the Personal Trainer seemed to be something of a safe zone. To say I've had my fair share of deep-and-meaningful conversations with women is like saying Andrew Bogut is kind of tall and Oprah is moderately wealthy. So, lads, feel free to use all, any or none of the following advice in both dating and non-dating situations.1. Don't try to impress her, outdo her or win - that only works on boys. If you're already married, don't date other women and pretend you're single. I know I shouldn't have to point this out but, apparently, I do. BTW, if you're married and you happen to date one of my friends, I might hurt you. Do you have any extra advice to add to my list above? That's a lot of one-on-one time with a broad cross-section of women and let me tell you, in between sets and reps we weren't talking about cage fighting, drag racing, currency rates or politics. A bloke who would listen, pay attention, acknowledge feelings and ask relevant questions without trying to fix or judge anything. Now, I'm certainly no authority when it comes to dating - although, I've had a few million - however, there seems to be a few no-brainer rules that some blokes are ignoring. Surprisingly, very few women are attracted to desperate.4. Under no circumstances should you talk about your sexual prowess. Read her non-verbal communication (it's screaming at you) and realise that "yes, I'd love to go to the basketball with you" actually means "are you f***ing kidding me? If you find yourself in some kind of cyber-dating situation before you meet her in person, don't send the twenty kilos lighter and fifteen years younger photo. She'll probably figure out you're fat and old when she meets you - which could be somewhat disappointing. And no, your fabulous personality and sharp wit won't offset the disappointment.10. Are we blokes really emotionally inept or are we just lazy, unaware and self-focused? FYI, I'm pretty sure that's the first time I've ever used the word scrotum in a published article. An Emotional Dumping Ground Over the course of twenty-five years on the gym floor (as a trainer), I completed more than 40,000 Personal Training sessions (around fifty each week) - which is terrifying enough - but what's even more frightening is that around seventy-five percent of those sessions were with women. That nodding you see is not agreement or connection, it's politeness and patience.8. The bartender exclaims, “Hey, we have a drink named after you!” Shocked, the grasshopper replies, “You have a drink named Steve?!? Even if it is as corny as the one above, everyone enjoys being entertained with some type of humor.